I was having one of those days, last week.
Okay. Fine. It was more like one of those weeks, but it all came to a head on that day.
I was not fun to be around. In fact, I was a real regular grumpus. I should probably make a shirt and sell those, because it was one of those days where the kids pretty much whispered, “She’s coming!” And then played dead a-la Toy Story when I entered the room.
I think I even snarled once.
It was one of those, homeschool got tough, and we will never make it to college kinda days.
And our workload became absolutely insane with all the priorities, and I’m not sure what to tackle next, I said not nice things to my husband, kinda days.
There just aren’t enough hours in the day… days.
And just when I was this {} close to dropping everything to move to Tahiti, we had to drop everything anyway, and start straightening up, because someone wanted to see our house.
Call me negative Nancy, but I’m there, guys. Bereaved planking, there. I realize it’s part of the game but it’s like, the worst game ever invented. Let’s just say that after nine months, the amount of curious/casual lookers is unreal. I sound like a total brat, but that’s because I’m being one. I can’t handle any more lost hours every time I have to prep just so someone can come see my house, only to tell us later they: can’t swing it (after the second showing)/the yard is too small/decide to cancel an hour before when the work has already been done… or something else they should have realized from the listing before they cost us hours of our time. Consider this small rant a PSA. We had one person tell us they wanted to rent, and when we told them we just weren’t interested in that {for many reasons}, they showed up with another realtor. Oh the stories we could tell but have refrained from until now …
I need a support group or something because let’s put our house on the market, they said. It will be fun, they said.
We’re tired.
And this game is miserable.
That wasn’t even counting the avalanche of laundry I was shoving desperately into the back of our truck right next to the pups who also had to be hidden because letting them loose on a family of interested buyers is never a good move. To top things off, I just started my new year healthy eating {wheeeeeee!} so I can’t even resort to my usual, drown-my-sorrows-in-chocolate-whilst-hiding-in-the-pantry, move…
It was one of those, I even stepped on an army man and stumbled into the wall, kinda days.
I was not a happy camper. And I had two options: To let my {slightly hormonal, in my defense} emotions get the best of me, or choose to focus on the good.
But I couldn’t see it. And I didn’t really want to.
I wanted to wallow in my self-induced misery for a bit. I wanted to climb into the covers of my warm bed instead of making it, so that when the realtor showed up, I could smear chocolate on my face and sit up like I was surprised after being disturbed on a Netflix/Making of a Murderer binge. Yes, I’m to that place of wanting to do bizarre things with a hidden camera every time someone wants a showing. No judging.
And so after dragging the entire family to the neighborhood park so we could hide in our car while a person {that we never heard from again} came to see our house, catching up on a little work, and trying to touch up on our missed school and… and… and…
I drew Emerson a bath.
After a while of listening to her sing while I worked in the studio, she called me from the bathroom to tell me she was ready to help her rinse.
So I sighed, and trudged into the bedroom, and then the bath. Feeling a little sorry for myself.
Feeling a little downtrodden by all my first world grumpy guss problems.
Woe. Is. Me.
And when I took a moment to look up, she was waiting for me. Just like this.
It’s so easy to let the little things build up. Get the best of us. Keep us from being our best selves.
Keep us from focusing on what’s important.
Because giant bubbleheads proudly procured at bath time are important, and I almost missed it. It’s so easy to get caught up in it all, and forget about what really matters.
I swear, this is why I have children. For this, and so many other reasons.
There it was, that joy. Bubbling back to the surface again with belly laughs as I documented it with a photo, and then rinsed her hair. And I heard, for the first time that day, her deep thoughts on bubble bath suds vs. shampoo suds and why bubble baths must be more nourishing for the hair and she wondered if her head could be as big as an astronauts helmet…
I don’t ever want to miss these moments.
So I took a moment to breathe.
And laugh.
And feel a bit humbled with the reminder that sometimes, when I’m having one of those days, I just need a moment to be thankful. Because things are good.
And maybe… just maybe… {fingers crossed, hopefully} the very next person to see our home will be the one to buy it, but we won’t know if give up. We’ve just been waiting for the right family who will truly appreciate it… with giant bubble heads and belly laughs of their own, to come along. So we can joyfully pass it to them.
I wouldn’t have missed that moment for anything.
It was one of those days.
KariAnne says
I’ll move to Tahiti with you.
Every day of the week and twice on Sundays.
Anna says
I love this and your perspective. The game of selling a home in a bad market is absolutely brutal. I simply can’t believe people aren’t scooping up your house, but that’s why it’s just not even fair. We’ve been there too! Hang in there, guys! I just know it will happen for you soon!
Venita Hawcroft says
We had lived in Nashville for 15 years when my husband lost his job and couldn’t find another one in the area. We listed our home while continuing to homeschool our 3 children, I finally got fed up with all the showings and refused to leave when someone came for a Lookie Loo. The children and I would just go outside and play after hiding all the dirty laundry and lunch dishes in my van in the garage. I was shocked at the number of people who booked showings who weren’t interested in buying a house at all. On many occasions it would be groups of girlfriends having a girl’s day out and they would tell me they saw my home pictures online and came over to get decorating ideas for their own home. Just a girls day of fun. I had cleaned for hours and destroyed my plans for the day so you could have fun??? We did finally sale our home after a year and had several contracts where financing fell through and many offers to rent and other horror stories. I did start refusing showings when we were busy and told the realtor Saturday was the only day our home could be seen this week, he complained and wasn’t happy and then there would be 6 showings scheduled on Saturday but at least we only cleaned once.
ashley @ the handmade home says
Oh my word. I get so ragey about the lost time. It interrupts our school and work- we have a big project going on right now and I can’t work when I’m constantly prepping. I wanted to call up one lady and Bill her for lost hours ? I can’t tell you how many stories I want to tell! I am just relieved I’m not alone. Glad your home sold – and that was a smart request for Saturdays only. Why are people so inconsiderate?! I take great comfort in the concept of karma when they sell their own down the road! It blows my mind.
Jenny Mull says
OH.man. I get it. Last year, we did the same thing!! We had so many lookers who were just like that!it was so tough on this mama of 3 boys/ 4 dogs- also homeschooling. I will be praying for you!!
ashley @ the handmade home says
Awe thank you so much, Jenny! You are too sweet. We’re just glad to know we’re not alone!
Ashmasterflash says
Oh Ash. It’s going to be OK. Thank you for letting us in on your meltdown. Sometimes we women need the release! Just know that God has a perfect plan for YOU. His timing is perfect. My husband and I left Minneapolis to spend more time with my family and recoup financially. I felt the whole year the Lord was paving our steps and preparing us for the big move. Yet when it came time to go, we didn’t have any renters for our home. We didn’t have any jobs where we were going. And we left anyway because we knew God was telling us to do so and we put our trust in that. Within three weeks we found tenants and jobs, and everything was OK. Did you watch Steve Harvey’s post on FB today? Sometimes you just have to jump. Instead of waiting for your house to sell before you leave for Nashville…could you just jump? XOXOXO
ashley @ the handmade home says
Awe I’m so glad it worked out for you guys. We’ve thought through every single possibility with it all. Trust me. Without getting into personal details, let’s just say every situation is different.
Laurie says
I can totally sympathize! We had our house on the market for almost two years. Two years of stress with three kids, trying to keep their rooms picture perfect and hiding the laundry(mine always got shoved into the machines, whites/darks you name it! Just remember to sort it later) while strangers open your cabinets and peek through your closets – makes you feel so violated! Your deepest secrets exposed! It is HARD! You can’t even declutter those hidden spaces or pack boxes because that could potentially cause a huge mess that can’t be completed between all the million other things moms have to do in a day, and have to be shoved back into those closets or cabinets because PEOPLE ARE COMING!! My kids definitely saw a different side to me (and we can joke about it now!) But alas, We finally did sell our home and had TWO WEEKS to move a family of five and nearly 18 years worth of stuff but we managed (we were mopping our way out of the house as the realtor & buyers were driving up the road for the final walk-thru!) The excitement of setting up a new home will make those bad memories fade away and the kids are resilient and will enjoy the new adventure too. I’ll be sending positive thoughts your way for a generous buyer and a smooth transition into a new home. Good luck! ?
ashley @ the handmade home says
Awe thank you so much Laurie! It is SO good to know it’s not just us! And that people GET us. Feeling a little bonkers over here. And AMEN to the not being able to purge. I just want to throw everything away as we pack! I feel like I’ve been shoving ALL OF THE THINGS. HA! SO glad it worked out for you guys! I know it’s exhausting.
JB says
We had a home for sale in 2005. Every time we had a showing, I would knock myself out to make it look like Martha Stuart’s home….linen cabinets all lined up with everything facing in the same direction…no clutter ANYwhere…it was the perfect unlived in look each time the realtor brought someone over. Then one day my cat died. I knew when I went to work that she wasn’t doing well. My hubbs works out of our home. He called at work and explained to my very compassionate boss about the cat, and he thought she wasn’t going to last until I got home that evening. My boss sent me home, but by the time I got there, the cat had passed away. My hubs and I gently wrapped her up to take her to the vet to be cremated, and then took a ride rather than go back home right away.
When we did get home late that afternoon, the message light on the phone was blinking. The realtor had called and said she had someone to look at the house RIGHT NOW! I started to look around…it was Monday, and the Sunday paper was strewn all over the living room couch where hubbs had left it…there were (clean) dishes in the dish rack in the sink…the litter box had the top removed because the cat had been having trouble climbing in and out thru the opening…our TV had died, so we had a temporary one hooked up in the middle of the living room floor with wires all over the place while waiting for the new one to be delivered. The house could not have looked any worse! The realtor and buyers had been there and gone already. And guess what…THOSE WERE THE PEOPLE WHO BOUGHT THE HOUSE! I guess it just goes to show, when the right buyer comes along, it doesn’t matter how much, or little, you tried. If the house fits them, it’s gonna happen. Don’t sweat the small stuff 😉 Good luck on selling your home.
ashley @ the handmade home says
I LOVE this story. Isn’t that how life always works out? We’ve pretty much given up. And by given up, I mean I’m not scouring the baseboards daily anymore ;} I’m still a forever perfectionist. :/ SO Sorry about your cat. That’s always so hard, losing a pet and I know that was rough. I’m so glad it worked out for your house though!
Pamela says
i just subscribed to your blog and read this. Last year we listed our home and showed it a gazillion times. Seriously, at least once a week for 6 months. We did entertain 3 offers but did not accept any.I HATED it. SO MUCH WORK. Spent many hours at the dog park. I did not want to do anything to hinder God’s plan for us so it was magazine-photo ready every. single. time. We prepped, painted, trimmed and decluttered every drawer, closet, etc for months ahead of listing. A gabillion realtors hounded us after the listing expired. Our realtors were stumped it didn’t sell, want to discuss trying again. Well, God’s plan was for us to stay here. At least for now. 4 months later we understand, in part, why. I feel really badly for you. I am dreading doing it again. Horrible experience.