I’m hoping our awesome readers will forgive me this indulgence as I decided to recycle one of my all time faves. {Originally shared on 2.18.11}
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It’s that time of the year again.
Any of my fellow cohorts know exactly what this photo means. The Cadbury creme eggs have been released for yet another glutenous springtime free-for-all.
I’m kind of known, around these here parts, for my absolute obsession. In college, I had dates bring me the eggy goodness before we went out, as an alternative to flowers. Like I was some kind of chonkalicious, and the only way to my heart was through Cadburys and their gooey fabulous goodness. It totally worked. I was all, “you get me” and “let’s go out again.” the moment they handed me that box, even if the date was a total bomb.
So about a month ago, when I prematurely found a box of them at a gas station on our way to our friends’ beach house, I joyously grabbed up two: one for now, another for later, and hopped into the car to give myself a long-awaited bliss.
No, not two boxes. Two eggs. I was showing discipline…
Partay in the mizouth.
So, back in the family mini, I did a happy dance with my two treasures. Jamin fully understood the excitement of the moment for me, as I handed him his requested candy bar. He then asked the obvious, if they were left over from last year. (He knew better than to ask if one was for him-I’d actually come back out to the car and offered before making the purchase).
Let it be noted, that this was before they were readily available like they are now. I should have bought more, and I knew deep down it was an early release. Remember, this was before the whole Halloween egg thing and in January. Cadburys were more of a rarity. (I think the gas station people were breaking some international Cadbury regulations or something. Cut to giant Easter Bunny cuffing the gas station peeps and loading them into some creepy kidnapper van never to be seen again.)
I had a slight panic attack before unwrapping that wonderful rainbow of a foil wrapper, but my fears were silenced in that first bite. Any fellow egg lovers out there know that one of the worst things that can happen to a Cadbury egg is opening it with the outer shell cracked, having it’s gooey inner goodness slightly dried, and partially gummy. At that point, it’s just not worth the calorie intake. If I’m going to blow the last of my willpower on a major splurge, it’d reeeeeheaally better be worth it in the all-inhibitions-gone department.
But you know what the absolute worst thing that can happen, to someone who has excitedly found an early release of Cadbury eggs and purchased them at a gas station for over a dollar a pop {which should really contain GOLD on the inside because of their ridiculous pricing}…………?
DO you?
Having that one remaining Cadbury egg STOLEN.
Unbeknownst to me, our friend Martin loves them, too. I really had no idea at the time. Probably as much as I do. I would have purchased one for him. But Martin is British. And over in the UK, they have Cadbury eggs year round. He got to enjoy them all year growing up. I think the vending machines even carry them over there. Therefore he does not understand the rules in this game of shameless Easter egg coveting. (Strike one.)
And when we pulled up to the beach house, it was still very cold out, so I totally left the other egg in the car. Partially not thinking to take the time and unload one egg, since it wouldn’t melt, and deep down, avoiding the idea of someone ingesting said egg, because at this point I realized what I treasure I had in my possession.
The next day, Jamin and Martin hopped into the mini and took the kids to see some old historical landmark cannons, while Andrea and I stayed behind with the babies.
And Martin, who also equally loves the Cadbury eggs, joyfully partook in, and enjoyed my blissful chocolate without even so much as a reluctant care as to what he was doing with my early-found treasure. (Strike two.)
Later on the way out to dinner at Lulu’s, excited about a night out with music and good food {even if the kids wailed and pooped their pants} I looked down to see the remnants of the Cadbury foil, carelessly tossed in the middle of the console. Like lonely, leftover confetti after a missed parade.
Disappointment in the form of shiny, empty promises.
Utter devastation.
You see Martin is, at this point, no better than a common murderer. He joyfully ingested MY treasure, but he’d completely failed to have the common decency to cover up the carnage he left behind. There was no mistaking that the egg was missing, or had innocently rolled out of the car. He’d taken what wasn’t his, and then shamelessly left the evidence for me to find. (Strike three. Times eleven.)
So a furious verbal flogging ensued, with Jamin, the person I trust with my life. The person I gave my name to. He allowed this to happen. Betrayal at its finest… because he took the knife… and twisted it. Had he no desire to defend my honor? No desire to salvage my beloved Cadbury egg?
And the furious texting ensued, as the thief was in the other car (4 adults + 5 kids) on our way to dinner. (Text below = way better when read in white trash redneck voice.)
For the record: Yes, it was extremely petty for me to freak out over a Cadbury egg to our kind friends who invited us to their family beach house. I think he saw it as an egg tax or something. But he didn’t even ask.
Because I would have said no. That’s how I roll.
Nothing comes between me and my food love.
For the record after that, it took a few more weeks for the eggs to be “officially released.” And for the record, I think that Martin stopped at about twenty Walmarts before he found his own stash. I shamelessly took photos (Jamin was kind enough to immediately gather for me out of sheer repentance when he found some at the local Walmart) of my own fabulous collection of Cadburys and sent them to him. I call that Cadbury karma.
Also, Martin finally located and purchased an entire box, and probably ate them all in one sitting. There was lots of Cadbudy-jealousy-texting. I was happy for him.
Kind of.
Andrea and Martin came to our home a few weeks ago. I shared my stash for dessert after dinner. I’m not THAT selfish.
Though I limited him to one.
And for the last few weeks, Jamin and I have hidden in the kitchen, and shamelessly stuffed them into our mouths. And when the kids walk in, and ask us what we’re doing, we drool out the words “NUFFING!” and then turn our heads so we can continue to enjoy the gooey goodness in quiet, blissful secret.
Because something that good, just can’t be wasted on naive youth.
Maybe I’ll save some for their Easter baskets.
Is there anything out there that you love THIS much?
See: More than friendships and your own children.
UPDATE: I totally had a box of these puppies delivered at my doorstep today. I may or may not have jumped up and down and squealed like a 16 year old girl upon receiving this peace offering from the Harris clan, though I credit the thoughtfulness to Andrea. I may or may not have already eaten two. I will continue to accept donations from any of you who also feel so moved to continue my gluttony to anyone who can find them now that they’re on sale after Easter. Thank you.
Happy post-Easter gluttony, peeps!
This is all Jamin's fault. Sorry, hate to throw you under the bus Jamin, but you KNEW what would happen if you let your friend eat your wife's coveted egg. DUH. My poor hubby can relate to Jamin. I've been known to have a food related meltdown or two. Or five. Or …yeah. Cadbury creme eggs? I can take them or leave them (does this mean you are dropping me as a blog bestie – gasp?!) Wait that just means more for you. Anyway nobody stands between me and my Trader Joe's dark chocolate peanut butter cups. I feel your pain. For real. 🙂 Erin
Bwahahahahaha THANK YOU Erin! Yes, jamin received a good food flogging after that misstep. He shouldve known better to protect my treasures! (you should've seen me pregnant. I was ruthless)
Listen, I have never eaten one. Are they really that good? Must I try one?
"NUFFING!" Oh, how my gut busted a bit at that one. You and I would be happy friends in real life.
I, too, love me a Cadbury egg come Easter-time. I usually buy one box and savor it through the season. The other item that my husband accuses me of hoarding/eating too much of is sugar cookies. I usually make them at Christmas, Valentine's Day, sometime in spring, and Halloween, and it's a small batch. He's lucky if he gets 2 or 3. And I tell myself I'm being a good mom by not allowing my kids more than a taste here or there. They don't need all that sugar, right?
ummm ya i think i love cadbury eggs as much as you do!!!!!! i absolutely cannot wait until easter so i can eat them! that and peppermint patties are the best and i will indulge in either right after running for 30 minutes (that's why i exercise, so i can eat alllll that chocolate;)
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I must admit I am not a fan of the Cadbury Eggs but my sister is and so is one of my very best friends. I would NEVER take them on account I am not that stupid and well, you just don't take chocolate from a lady. Anyway, thanks for this post. It made me laugh so hard I cried!
I LOVED this post. It hit smack dab at home. I agree that children shouldn't have them until they can appreciate them. This is no regular candy. This is the KING of candy. You could steal all the rest of my candy, just leave me my Cadbury eggs.
I went out and bought two boxes this morning. My husband hid his box from me. (c;
Matushka – totally agree. And I think thats the cutest sideways smiley face I've ever seen.
Ran across this gem today:
http://blog.craftzine.com/archive/2011/02/how-to_homemade_cadbury_eggs.html
Suzanne: are you KIDDING me???? looking. right. now. salivating. excited. AHHHHHH!
Oh. my. goodness. You had me rolling! I totally get it! I am quite obsessed myself. But I have to say…what is up with those itty bitty eggs? You can't even get the taste of the gooiness inside before the whole dang thing is gone!! Those miniature ones are worthless!!! Oh…and glad I found your blog! I'll be following along now. Us cadbury peeps have to stick together! 🙂
Seriously rolling on the ground laughing hysterically while my husband stares at me in bewilderment! You are my mirror image when it comes to Cadbury eggs! I bought two boxes yesterday ($4 bucks–seriously?) and ate them all within about 20 minutes of arriving home. I shared one with my kids (who love them almost like I do). Fortunately for me, my hubby hates them so I usually get them all to myself! Thanks for sharing this. It was so great!
All hail the blessed Cadbury Egg! Easter candy is the best, no contest. Loved hearing about your obsession- I don't take it to the same extreme but I certainly don't judge you for it. And when I do have Cadbury in my life, I definitely don't share:)
Oh, I completely feel your pain! I'm a Cadburry Egg addict…. when they had them for Christmas several years ago, my husband put about 20 in my stocking. Needless to say, he's the best husband on the planet! Oh, and after I started reading this, I had to run to Walgreens to buy my own eggs (since I had depleted my weekly stash) so that I could finish reading this in bliss. Oh, yes, I did just run to Walgreens mid-blog-reading to get Cadburry Eggs.
This is hilarious! My husband has a similar obsession with the caramel eggs. I find wrappers in the strangest places as we have a Walgreen's way too close to home. Last year I filled up an egg carton for him in place of an Easter basket. He was in heaven and dare I say they were gone in about 3 days? I buy the mini ones for the kids. I had to laugh at the "And when the kids walk in, and ask us what we're doing, we drool out the words "NUFFING!" and then turn our heads so we can continue to enjoy the gooey goodness in quiet, blissful secret." comment. That's totally me!
Great post!
Ahhhh….yes, I remember them well. Every Easter…I couldn't wait. I'm drooling just thinkin' about 'em. But, alas! I haven't eaten one in 6 years. Found out I am unable to eat sugar. My daughter and I were in Walgreens this week and saw them. She doesn't eat sugar either. We just stood there staring at them and supported each other through the pain. We're praying for Cadbury to come out with a Splenda Egg. We found sugar free marshmallow easter bunnies and settled for one of those. It's just not the same.
We were in Ireland three years ago around St Patty's Day/Easter. And at McDonald's – not only did we enjoy Shamrock Shakes while in Ireland (too fun!) – they also had Cadbury Creme Egg McFlurries!! I am SO serious.Chunks of chocolate-y egg and creme with LOADS of yellow yolk gooey goodness swirled in. Oh.My.
Sometimes I just open the photo I took of it and dream.
I, too, am a Cadbury egg lover….but here in Canda, we have them ALL YEAR…..yes, I said All Year.
When I see the sheen from the wrappers peeking out of the box on the grocery store checkout, I about have a heart attack. I HEART Cadbury eggs!
That was hilarious! I would be furious if someone ate one of my Cadbury Eggs! 🙂 I haven't had any yet this year since I gave up candy for lent (WHAT was I thinking??) I hope to have many in my Easter basket though.
You do NOT love them as much as I do…
That's right, I said it.
OH MY GOODNESS, I have never laughed out loud so much and snorted so many times while reading a blog. Never! And this is my first time to read your blog, period. Whoa sister, what a way to find you. I don't know what made me laugh more….the redneck text, or when the NUFFING when the kids catch ya! Seriously, seriously funny stuff woman. I think it makes me laugh so much because you totally GET me. My gosh, we're Cadbury twins! Whew, gotta go rest….my stomach and face hurt from laughing so much!!!!! So glad I found you. 🙂
I just ate a Cadbury egg in your honor. I love Sundays during Lent when you've given up sweets but … oh for Sundays…. 😀 No guilt.
love this article, I have one more egg from a pack of 5 that I will be finishing now as I type this- got me craving it! xoxo